Mothering Magazine: Pregnancy after Psychosis

Victory over Post Partum Psychosis
The author of this excellent and timely article contacted me about 18 months ago. She had read my story in Kathy Kendall Tackets first book titled Postpartum Depression, A Nurse’s Guide. She asked if I would be willing to be a part of her article and I agreed. This huge article just appeared in the May/June issue of Mothering, and the digital version is up for those who would like to pay for it.
My story is included in a side bar titled, Pregnancy after Psychosis, and appears on page 61 of the magazine.
I was thrilled by the excellent information shared with Mothering readers and predict this article will go down as one of the best primers on Post Partum Psychosis that has ever been written. The fact that it was written by a mother who experienced Psychosis after the birth of her second child makes it that much more credible.
Sarah Fields, the author of this article, is expecting her third child right now.
She told me that the message of healing in my journal which was included in Kathys book really helped her gain some perspective while putting her mind back together after her hospitalization.
I was healed somewhat by reading her story of being able to continue breastfeeding, even while on meds, and the way that the hospital was so open to her husband and baby staying in her hospital room with her. They pushed a couple of beds together to make a big family bed right in the mental hospital.
Being forced to wean my daughter, compelled by a court order to take a cocktail of psychiatric meds and my six week hospitalization traumetized me just as much as the actual psychotic episode I experienced after the birth of my first child. I was also raped in the State Hospital by four orderlies the first night I was committed on a medical certificate. These horrors just put layer upon layer of trauma into the cells of my body, and made it very difficult to heal.
It comforted me to read Sarahs Story and realize that progress has indeed been made in how psychotic women are treated in mental hospitals. Being forced to take meds and stop nursing my daughter were complete injustices perpetrated by ignorant, power hungry professionals. My heart literally broke when the judge sentenced me to 90 days of forced incarceration in that evil state mental hospital in Pontiac Michigan and forced me to eat their dope.
During the six days before I went to court, I spent quite a bit of time singing patriotic hymns very loudly during my various stays in the seclusion room. This annoyed the employees, but it gave vent to my very frustrated state of mind. I suppose we never really appreciate what it means to be free until that right is taken away and we have to fight to get it back. The six weeks I spent in the hospital were a defining moment in my life. And because I was so young, only 21, and just beginning my adult life, starting my “mature” years with the stigma of mental illness was pure horror. After a couple of years it dawned on me how freeing this event had actually been.
So many people live their lives afraid of what others think of them. I don’t. I honestly do not have that fear, and I believe it is because having been crazy, I know that it is not all bad.
As I have lived these past 18 years as a wife and mother, I have always been able to follow my conscience, even when doing so was a difficult choice, simply because I had no fear of others thinking I was nuts. And following my heart has taken me to amazing places as a woman.
When I was a teen I used to wear a button that said “why be normal?”.
Normalcy tends to lead to conformity, which leads to a loss of freedom, which can eventually lead to slavery.
I’m not too interested in living my life as a slave. To anyone or anything. For 14 months I was a slave to the psychiatrists and their socerers chemical cocktail which deprived me of my health, my libido, my emotions, and filled up my body and mind with a toxic soup that took years to cleanse out of my tissues. (Haldol, Stelazine, Lithium, and Prozac)
Never Again!!!
May each mother find the healing she and her family so richly deserve, and may the truth set our world free from the conspiracies of very, very wealthy men and women, who are living most deliciously off the tortured minds of the mentally ill.
Jenny Hatch

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