Last night my oxygen tubes tangled up in my hair and I awoke feeling like something was off.
This past month I obtained handicap designation for myself and my car around three chronic health issues. This step has been something I have put off for five years since being diagnosed with chronic hypoxia.
The most problematic issue has been my spine. I have scoliosis and it has gotten markedly worse over the past few years while working as a professional driver.
I also suffer from a variety of emotional illnesses and always seem to be battling one thing or another around childhood trauma.
It has proven most helpful to get some new equipment for my oxygen supplementation and handicap designation for our car.
I am an Uber/Lyft Driver and having the proper tools in place to do my job well has felt incredibly empowering.
I also have been renting a wheelchair for certain situations to enable me to do more outside of my home.
I used it for the first time last month conducting a ninety minute stake choir practice and the chair was perfect!
We found a used wheelchair on Craigs List and it feels good to own one now.
I am also working with a new young chiropractor and am excited to see what we can do to increase my mobility over the next few years.
She put me on a mold protocol to help cleanse the tissues of my body using herbs and other supplements. We lived in a home in Cedar City Utah for three years that had a serious black mold problem and she believes the mold may have contributed to some serious infections I have suffered with these past few years.
Now I am wondering if the mold contributed to the untimely death of my dog Samwise Gandalf.
Lifelong anaphylactic allergies, asthma, and eczema are always lurking in the shadows and I cannot go anywhere without an epi pen, anti-histamines, and my inhaler.
I also have had several recent breathing emergencies that proved scary and sobering as we have tried to wrestle with how much I can do both inside and outside of our home. I am also learning the limitations of my battery powered oxygen concentrator.
I have been back on 24 hr a day oxygen supplementation for months since a setback a few months ago.
That being said, I am planning to audition for a few theatrical companies this year and hope to spend some quality time making music and performing onstage even if I am on oxygen in a wheelchair.
In the spirit of using music to heal, I started a new playlist on my YT channel to share my songs. Memorizing these lyrics and new arrangements will be a fun fall project.
I have also been starting my day with the three M’s. Movement, Math, and Music.
I do yoga, a Saxon math lesson, and work on memorizing the lines/songs of Ruth from Pirates of Penzance. These types of activities keep my mind and body occupied with positive activity and help my brain to function better.
I pick a musical theatre role I desire to play and memorize all songs, lines, and staging.
I have done this now with Mother Abbess from The Sound of Music, Mrs. Hannigan from Annie, Nettie from Carousel, Mrs. Thenardier from Les Mis, and Bea from Something Rotten.
The daily memorization of a difficult part is really great for overall brain nimbleness and helps beat back depression.
Thanks for stopping by!
I hope you have a great day!!!
PS – I was given a new handicap license plate by the state of Colorado and spent a few extra dollars to choose my own letters and numbers.
And from my Video Audition Page
Please Note that I am completely disabled by scoliosis and have to perform in a wheelchair on oxygen supplementation. I need a dressing room that is ADA compatible with no aerosols (hairspray) or cigarette smoke in use and with close access to a wheelchair friendly restroom.
I like to sleep in my own bed, so if your theatrical company is within a two hour car ride from Longmont Colorado, I will be commuting to rehearsals and performances. This would include Fort Collins to the north all the way down to Colorado Springs and anywhere along the front range and up to Breckenridge in the mountains.
If your company is out of state or more than 100 miles from my home, I will need ADA compliant housing on the ground floor with no stairs, no smoking roomates, and a wheelchair friendly shower stall.
The hardest part for me as these past few months have played out was interfacing with allopathic docs to reup my prescriptions and get the spinal scans and blood/urine work.
I hate allopathy with this viscerally palpable disgust and it galls me that my body compels me to swallow my pride and go get what I need from them every couple of years.
I am grateful to have had a x-ray to just get a benchmark of where I am.
When I was 15 I wore a brace for scoliosis for a year and the S curve was 17 degrees at the top and 32 degrees at the bottom.
The scan showed that the curve is much worse up top which fits with my symptoms. I can feel my left ribcage collapsing into my left lung and squeezing my diaphragm.
How much this contributes to my breathing issues I do not know.
I did feel somewhat defensive with my own children as they questioned the move to the wheelchair. They sorta felt like it was me giving up. One daughter didn’t even know that I have had scoliosis my whole life because I don’t talk about it.
After using the brace for a year, when I was 16 I threw it out and started seeing an osteopath who encouraged me to dance, lift weights, swim, and do anything I wanted to strengthen my back.
This was very freeing because it fit with my own intuition of what was important.
My teenage orthopedist had limited my exercise to swimming.
During my 20’s, 30’s, and most of my 40’s I used yoga and swimming to keep in shape, especially during my pregnancies. But I also walked quite a bit and rode my bike.
It has only been these last few years that I have been forced to slow way down.
And what I have had to confront just recently is that I may not get my health back any time soon.
I plan to keep working on it, of course, but I am reconciling to a life with serious limitations and it has not been easy.
We’ll see how it goes. I am constantly being pummeled with the most intense spiritual warfare for my political activism and all I can say is that it takes a heavy toll on my health.
We celebrated Paul’s 60th!